Fitness & Comparison: Motivating or Manipulative?

When we talk about comparison in the fitness world we usually think about comparing ourselves to others. There’s lots of reassurances out there like “You are your only competition” and “Just be better than you were yesterday” to help us take a step back from it.

But I don’t just mean that we’re glancing at the numbers on the treadmill beside us and secretly trying to beat them. I mean the practice of before and after pictures as well as the ever-growing fitness community on Instagram.

See, it strikes me that even if we preach not comparing ourselves and posting our fitness journeys for our own sake there’s still something bigger going on.

Do we really think that comparison isn’t like, %70 of what’s going on outside the fitness sphere on Instagram? As a regular practice, we follow brands, influences and celebrities who we admire. We covet their clothes, cars, homes – their whole lifestyle.

So when the account we’re following is a fitness-specific influencer or celebrity can we truly pretend we aren’t comparing and coveting their fitness based on their body in posed pics and workout videos?

Now, I will acknowledge here that fitness influencers are probably doing the most out of any influences to help their fans achieve what they have. You admire my abs? Here’s an ab workout I like. You want my perfect booty? Here’s my booty routine.

Sure, they make money off their fans desire to be like them but at least they seem more likely to share the how-to than other influencers.

You don’t see a lot of other influencers breaking it down for you how they got what they have and how you can too. They just profit off your admirations as the likes and comments roll in.

Even with the before and after photos I mentioned earlier we’re encouraged to engage in a detailed comparison of ourselves to ourselves. While that’s a little healthier than only lusting after the results of others, it still feeds into a comparison mindset when considering our current fitness and future goals. I think it’s an awesome practice that we reflect on our own progress and success. We still have to talk about it, though, when we talk about comparison.

The biggest problem, for me, is that a lot of the influencers who encourage comparison either with before and after photos or just putting themselves out there in a way that forces you to compare where you are compared to their fitness journey, do so to sell products.

The fitness fam on insta is overflowing with “positive vibes” and “support” but a lot of companies are successfully harnessing the community for comparison, admiration and sales.

It definitely makes me a bit bitter to see “fitness influencers” or “fitness models” selling detox teas, certain supplements and diet programs. Like, this is why we can’t have nice things, ya’ll. Too many people harness the power of community for marketing and misdirect our well meaning support.

I wouldn’t call for the end of the fitness community on insta because so much good does come from it – I think we, as fitness focused accounts – might just have some work to do to reclaim our community.

Being “Off Plan” Has Been my Best Fitness Decision in Months

I posted before about loving the Anna Victoria work out plan and about how much the virtual community around that plan made a difference in my fitness journey.  There’s still love in my heart for the virtual fitness community, especially on instagram. I still adore Anna Victoria as a fitness guru but I’ve moved away from following her plan.

I posted about this, too, when I talked about longing for more creativity in my fitness.

So here’s a little update stemming from those thoughts:

For a Beginner, it Has to be About Beginning

That seems overly simple and ridiculously obvious, but hear me out.  Even the beginner plans I’ve tried have a number of expectations.  They tend to look super do-able on paper but in the middle of a work out maybe not so much. Besides that, even when they are genuinely within my abilities there are other problems around success and failure when this journey is just at the begining and so, so fragile.

Being “off plan” might be one of my best fitness decisions yet.  When I followed a fitness plan created by someone else, even if I loved all the components of that plan, it created equal opportunities for failure and success.

If I followed the plan with dedication and discipline I would see results and experience all the joys of success. As someone who loves lists and plans I took great satisfaction in checking off work out after workout, day after day.  I really enjoyed the sense of accomplishment that came with completing first one workout, then one week, then another.  I liked knowing I wasn’t alone but actually participating alongside so many other people subscribed to the same plan.

All that said… each day that I missed a workout or each move I couldn’t physically do in a given workout became a hovering failure.  A bit of a cloud above my head and they added up until they felt bigger than my successes.  As soon as the list of perceived failures grew longer than the list of successes and check marks the cause seemed lost.

Now, like much that is related to fitness, the failure I felt so discouraged by was as much in my head as anything else.  With a little work, I’m sure it could be overcome.

It would have been a worthy cause to overcome those hang ups.  However, I chose instead to rethink my approach to get around the hangups.

What “Off Plan” Looks like For Me

Now I commit to one hour of working out per day. I have very few rules for what that hour has to look like.  It can look the same every day or different every day.  So far it’s the same every day and I’ve been focused on cardio using the treadmill in the garage.

This allows me to be a little gentler with my expectations of myself at the beginning of my journey.  I don’t have the strength, endurance or agility that I have in the past.  As frustrating as that can be, having minimal expectations has given me the opportunity to rebuild while also forgiving myself for what I’ve lost, and what I’ve gained.

So far, moving “off plan” has opened more possibilies and given me a healthier mental approach to fitness.

What has changed your fitness routine?

Carmen

 

#MondayMotivation My Fave Fitness accounts on Instagram

This Monday I thought I’d share a little of my #MondayMotivation with you.  I’ve written before about how instagram specifically can play a big role in fitness and fitness motivation.  It’s a less interrupted feed than facebook, plus we “follow” more than we friend.  Above all, it’s so visual and can help us see our own goals when we see everyone else crushing theirs.  

Here’s a few of my fave accounts from my feed

@AnnaVictoria

Anna Victoria is the main personal trainer type that I follow. I prefer accounts that I guess at least seeeeeeem less like the ultimate interaction with them is for you to buy what they sell.  Obvi it would be ideal for Anna if you’d like her content so much you buy her products BUT the reason I’ve followed her for so long (and even bought some of her products) is that she is the QUEEN of #realtalk about body positivity. Her fit body is her business – her body is the ultimate ad for why you should pay to know her workouts – but she still shows us the rolls, the changes, the things that bug her.  She practices the kind of body positivity she preaches and I love it! 

@thefitwaywithashley 

If there’s an overall vibe for an insta account…thefitwaywithashley is perpetually cheerful. She always smiles and her captions are full of real talk and honesty about how this fitness journey goes.  She shares about having “good body image days” and also douting if she should post a certain photo because of that pressure we all feel to only share the things we feel amazing in and nothing where we think our imperfections show. Plus all her workout photos are a great reminder to get your butt to the gym, on to the matt, wherever it needs to be for you to get your sweat on! 

@Fatgirlfedup

There are SO many reasons to love this account and about 1 million other people agree.  This account follows Lexi’s journey and 312 pound weight loss, achieved with diet and exercise, over two years. She also gets real about the less photogenic side like loose skin and skin removal surgery.  She provides so much motivation by sharing her story and makes you feel like if she could wake up and start this journey 300 pounds ago, you can too!  

@robinmolyneaux__

I love that Robin’s account showcases a little bit of everything. She’s stylish, she’s funny, she’s real and she’s fit.  We’ve messaged back and forth in the past and she’s the sweetest, most encouraging soul.  I love that there’s so much support out there in the instagram fitness community and Robin is a real life example of how awesome that can be! 

@losinggravity

Okay at this point is it a surprise that I’m sharing another AMAZING account full of #realtalk? It shouldn’t be.

I love the story of a big girl getting it together and sharing her fitness success. Especially when the bio is clear that these results are from diet and exercise. From where I’m at (ahem, way bigger than I want to be) these are the stories I admire because these are the stories I’m trying to write for myself with each healthy meal and every work out. Plus there’s a lot more to it than “I didn’t have abs and now I do” or “this dress didn’t fit and now it does”.  Changing our bodies can have a lot of side effects and losinggravity is here with the honesty about it all.

@inked beauty.getsfit

I love this account because as of literally today hers is a body that shows progress (She posts great before and afters) but she still looks real. Gorgeous. Fit. Strong. and REAL. I get so discouraged when alllll the”fit girls” I see look the same and as amazing as they look, as happy as I am for their success, as much as they should keep chasing their goals… it makes me feel hopeless because I am SO far from being THERE with them.

This account though is so much realness and honesty it’s amazing.  Plus she is some pretty legit fashion and tattoo #goals so it’s not just the same content over and over! 

@bodyposipanda 

No list of my fave instagram accounts could ever be complete without this one.  In the midst of my insta-scrolling and fitness motivation bodyposipanda is the voice of self love and body positivity! She’s here to remind us all that we don’t have to change a thing about our bodies and we can celelbrate and love our bodies even when we know they don’t fit in a certain box (or size!) Seriously, she’ll make you smile every damn day! 

For Fit Sake: Week Two

So last Friday I talked about starting a new series, For Fit Sake, so I could force myself to talk about this fitness journey and stay accountable.  It kind of comes with the idea that if I’m forcing myself to report on how it’s going I’ll try harder to make it go well.

So far, so good! I am just wrapping up week 2 using Anna Victoria’s Body Love app for workouts. It’s not super feasible with busy family life for me to commit to the meal plan in the app, but more on food in a bit.

Honestly, sometimes I do have to generalize the workouts a little bit if there’s a move I struggle with too much or if I don’t have equipment available. I’ve been working on staying as close to the workout plan as possible while making sure I never miss a day. Sunday is rest day, and other than that I never miss a day.

I’ve also joined Planet Fitness. My husband (Ben) and girlfriend (Maggie) have been going for a few months. It took a bit of figuring out because I don’t drive so I needed to figure out with Ben and Maggie how I’d get to the gym and make a schedule that worked.

I go a couple times a week with Maggie and whenever Ben and I are free at the same time we try to go.

I really like the chance to get in some extra cardio and I’m working my way towards remembering how to do strength training at the gym.

Now I said I’d come back around to talking about food. The thing is, I’ve gotten really good at working out often but I’m still in a serious love affair with carbs so… still working on eating well.  Week one I was great. Week two I’ve eaten a lot of bread. We’ll see what week three brings… I suppose all things can’t be improved at once, but at least there’s progress.

Question of the week: What do you find easier to do well with – working out consistently or eating well?

New Series: For Fit Sake

Okay so obviously I wanted to write about my fitness journey or health journey or weight loss journey – whatever you want to call it – when I started this blog.  In my mind it would have a bit of everything from my life and right now the three most important pillars that define my day to day life are my love life, my career and my quest to get healthier with the side effect of getting smaller.  If I’m really honest it starts with wanting to be smaller and I just know that the truth is I need to be healthier if I want to shrink.

Notice something about the blog? Two of those things get posted about all the time but something is missing. I haven’t been able to write honestly about my fitness journey because truthfully it’s been a mess.

Like anyone else, I prefer to write about my successes. I imagined myself writing these posts about having done this exercise or eaten that food and seeing results that made me happy.

Well here I am at my heaviest.

Damn it – that sucks to write. It sucks to admit publicly and to even think about going on, talking and writing about being here. It feels like the same old same old – I’ve been ‘at my heaviest” for some time now, except that number, what that phrase means on the scale, has been creeping up.

One of the most successful strategies I’ve had for losing weight in the past has been when I posted more regularly to my fitness-focused instagram. Of course I plan to get posting and engaging there again because it helped but I realized that this blog was always meant to have fitness on it so why shouldn’t it be a part of my accountability posts?

For Fit Sake is going to be an ongoing series posted every Friday where I’m making myself stay accountable about the week. I don’t want it to be just a diary so i’m going to encourage myself to learn each week and have something with a bit more substance to share and hopefully in the process of creating a series I’m proud of I’ll also be building a lifestyle that matches.

Things to look forward to this Friday and in near-future Fridays:

• I’m starting again with the Body Love app by Anna Victoria. I really like her workouts and her as a fitness coach – she’s created a great community and a beautiful app so there’s no reason for me to go somewhere else at this moment. (Hint: 1 week in it’s going well!)
• Updates to my fitness journal – what it looks like, how I use it, I’ll try to share.
• Setting up space for myself to workout. I’ll share what working out at home means to me and how that’s changed.

You can find my instagram if you’d like the daily updates and details, too! My fitness focused instagram is @fitish.kitten

Since I’m starting here I want to know – what are you biggest struggles in creating a fitter or healthier lifestyle?

My (Ongoing) Battle with Body Positivity

The body love movement is just so freaking happy, bubbly and pastel coloured. Seriously… check Pinterest. Go ahead and search “body positive” there. I’ll wait.

Did it look something like this?

Gosh there are some great messages but it’s just sooooo pastel. Nothing wrong with pastel, in and of itself, I like pastels… but there’s something missing in this movement and these messages. Something I need.

My mom and I spoke not long ago about how it seems so ridiculously easy to be kind and see the beauty in others but when it comes to ourselves it seems impossible.  Working in retail I used to be someone women I didn’t know confessed their insecurities to… they’d tell me “I love this dress but I can’t show my legs…” or “That top is adorable but there’s no way it’d look good on me.” I was there for them, more than happy to encourage them to let go of those negative ideas and embrace wearing whatever the f*ck they wanted.

Retail is a notoriously menial job but damn did I feel proud of myself when customers walked away glowing because they found a bit of confidence in the outfit I helped them pick.

Then I went shopping and passed right by the shorts, skipped the crop tops, and wouldn’t even look at anything fitted because my mind told me don’t you dare – you’ve gotten too big for all that!

How was it so easy to embrace the positive and help other women fight the very same demons that I would let win me over? Why did I tell them to go ahead and buy the short shorts while I searched for a way to hide my body?

It took a few days for it to click but I think I’m beginning to realize what makes Body Positivity so illusive in how I think about myself:

I see my body as a personal (and public) failure.

I can’t be skinny, even just for a second. I can’t look a whole lot smaller than I am. I can’t show people what I intended to look like or wish I looked like… I can’t make them not see all the things I pick on myself for.

In that sense, my body is public.  Whether it’s the figure I want or not, it’s part of my public image and how I’m viewed.

And I haven’t made it a secret that I wanted it to be a small, toned imitation of what we see in literally all our media.  I have an instagram account @fitishkitten which is public – anyone can follow it – and 850 or so people do. They’ve all seen me, in my underwear taking “before” pictures… and 6 months later taking “before” pictures again because time passed but the pounds stayed. And the process just repeats.

I’ve never posted “after pictures”.

I’ve written about it on this blog… not a lot, because I don’t always have the right thing to say, but none the less. I’ve written about wanting to lose the weight. I’ve written about the excitement of losing 4 pounds.

4 pounds didn’t make my jeans fit. I am still down those 4 pounds but I haven’t lost more (yet?).

So that I want to be smaller is my very personal relationship with myself, but it’s also very public knowledge.

I know that doesn’t need to be past tense. I know I can still (and will still) continue my efforts to lose weight.

But I realize that not being where I wanted to be, where I said I’d be, is a big part of why I can’t seem to make my thoughts more positive.  It’s not as simple as telling myself that I can’t wear this or that, or that I’m unattractive because of my size. In telling myself that I can’t have this or that because of my size there’s also a narrative of you could have had that, could have been better but you weren’t good enough on your diet or at the gym. This is your fault.

I know the way I think about myself and body positivity is flawed. I love reading the posts of body positive icons and I understand the message that nothing needs to change for us to love ourselves. I know I’m supposed to love myself at any size. I know that I’m allowed to love myself even if it’s not the way I planned.

Yet here I am – spreading a message of body positivity that I let myself believe doesn’t apply to this body.

This shit is so much harder than it looks

Real. Talk.

I love the messages in the pastel pinks and purples. I love the illustrations of girls loving themselves and I am HERE for the insta-babes rocking their rolls, their swimsuits, their everything and not giving a f*ck who finds it “attractive” or “insta-worthy”.

But if it was as simple as being told “love your body” and “size is just a number” or “Don’t let your mind bully your body”… well if it was as simple as that I wouldn’t be so far in to this post.

Some days I put on my stretchy pants and my fave comfy sweater and I enjoy being able to just breathe. But other days I need to leave the house. I might have something to do where I want to look put together, polished even. Or I might be going out with my beautiful girlfriend who has style for days. I want to feel good about how I show who I am to the world.

This is where it turns out that the quotes on pinterest don’t help very much. They don’t make my jeans fit. They don’t take away my dislike for that gentle collection of pudge around my midsection. They certainly don’t make it look less violent when that pudge is squeezed in the wrong way creating some god-awful muffin top.

The idea that I cannot be seen to have such a soft and chubby body is so deeply ingrained that it’s like if I just searched harder or adjusted my top this way and my pants that way… maybe I could somehow fool people looking at me in to just not seeing the 100 pounds of body I wish I didn’t have. Right?

Like a little well placed draping of the fabric fools everyone.

These demons know how to protect themselves better than I know how to fight. These demons don’t just tell us that we are fat, that we are unattractive or that we don’t deserve certain styles or experiences because of our body.

These demons tell us that body positivity doesn’t apply to us. That the “chub rub club” is a punishment, not a babe squad, and that this body can’t have my love. So even though I might surround myself with body positive messages my mind is a fortress against their positive effects.

It is the thing that body positive messages aren’t equipped to help us with; we need a body positive movement of leather wearing, mohawk rocking, force weilding badasses with better advice than “have a bubble bath” or “repeat “I deserve happiness” until you’re happy”. Sorry girls – I love the girly, pretty, bubble bath image but I’ve sat in that bath-bombed water until it was cold and when the bubbles disappeared I still hated the body they hid.

I need a movement that answers the demons of negative self talk and the crippling effects of low self esteem with equal force and fury.

It has to be bigger than the industry selling me my skinny self one pill and one protein shake at a time.

So let’s band together and create it. We can still sparkle. I will still love pastels. But let’s make our edges sharper, let’s get sassy and crazy and be bold.

Let your inner tough girl beat down the inner bitch who calls you fat

How do you make your body love louder than your doubt? I wanna know 😀

Discovering Progress

I struggle to think of what I might want to write when it comes to fitness. Mostly this is because I often feel like I’m not really getting anywhere in my weight loss journey and I don’t want to repeatedly write about how it feels to fail.

But today I was working on my fitness notebook – more on that to come – when I realized I am making progress. It’s slow, and a little inconsistent from week to week, but it’s progress. That realization inspired this post with the goal of sharing two things:

First, a friendly reminder (because I needed it) that how we feel isn’t always a good reflection of reality. For example, I feel like I’m the biggest I’ve ever been, and like I haven’t made any progress. I feel like I constantly choose to eat junk food despite knowing that it isn’t conducive to my goals. I feel hopeless.

Part of this is because I track my habits on a micro level. Each meal and snack of each day, and taking my weight every morning… the day to day fluctuations are often times all I see.  This is the down fall of micro tracking.  The benefit, for me, comes in two ways. First of all knowing that each thing will be measured keeps a constant pressure to make better and better choices more often.  It also means that when I take a moment to mentally “zoom out” and see what all this daily tracking is adding up to over time, I have more information to complete that zoomed out understanding.

This is how today I was able to realize I’m down 4.2 pounds this month. It’s not the spectacular progress we all hope for in our first month. Some weeks I lost more than expected and other weeks none at all. However it averages out to about 1 pound a week and that’s better progress than I thought I’d achieved.

I got caught up thinking about all the mistakes. Every spontaneous drive through and indulgent snack… until I realized that while I should continue striving to cut unhealthy habits I do have some progress to celebrate going in to week 5 with the notebook.

Now that’s the second thing I wanted to share today – the notebook.

I’ve attached a picture of my weekly layout because we all know a picture is worth a thousand words. The cover really just reminds me to be a whole person and not let weight be my identity.

I use this place to physically track my day to day weight, food, water and movement. I use a stencil to make it cute and organized.  It’s pretty simple but the process of recording and being able to flip back and look at how things are changing week to week is helpful for me to stay focused.

I’m not following any explicit plan. I spent about a month working through the first 3rd of the Body Love app by Anna Victoria. Ultimately it wasn’t the right program for me. I really want to be the kind of person that can strictly follow a program but I’m realizing I may not be. It’s well known that following a strict workout plan exactly is impractical for many people with busy lives (hello!) but I also struggle to stay focused while being flexible. If i forgive myself for having a busy day and missing a work out the next day I am full of excuses about why I can miss another work out, and so on. If I am not following the plan perfectly I am too lenient with myself and feel like a failure. There’s no big win for me.

Maybe at another time in my life a fully developed program will make more sense.

Since I was reflecting on the last month I brainstormed some ways to get moving in the next month. More on those ideas later!

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For the Love of Fitness

Real talk: There’s a lot I love about fitness, of course. But I’ve fallen off the wagon so instead of talking about what’s happening or going well today I need to talk about what’s not happening on this journey and how I ended up where I am now.

I’ve been thinking about the factors that hinder my fitness journey.  I mean, you’d think if I really wanted it then the commitment would be easy, right? So how am  I sitting here at the heaviest I’ve ever been feeling like today I’m at the beginning, again? (or still?)

Of  course, I’d be starting today because it’s a Monday – all new journeys are best started on Mondays.

But what makes it so hard to get anywhere with this journey?

This week I realized that one of the biggest factors has been the source of my motivation.

You see, the very first time I even thought about a treadmill or “getting in shape” it was because I hated my body.

But the longer I’ve been on this fitness journey the more I’ve found it’s a journey of love, not hate.  It’s a journey that encourages us to love what we do. Be it yoga, running, lifting, swimming or a sport – we’re supposed to enjoy it. And when it comes to our bodies, we’re supposed to love them too. Love them because they carry us, support us, they are how we participate in that activities we enjoy. So we owe them some appreciation.

How can I enjoy an activity I’m only doing to change a body I refuse to love? I was trying to enjoy a lifestyle that is full of positivity but I was approaching it with all the wrong ideas about motivation and dedication.

Hate only gets you so far.

There are lots of enlightened quotes about karma and positive vibes and letting go of the negative in our lives.  We usually think of these mantras as survival tips for jobs, and friendships and family.

But they work in fitness too.

You have to let go of that negative energy and not act on it.

I get about two and half weeks of progress when I’m working with hate. I get two and a half weeks of routine treadmill time, vegetables and daily water quotas.  I get two and a half weeks of forcing myself to do all the things I’m told will help me leave behind a body I hate and build the dream bod.

And then…

I focus on things I love.

Because it’s easier. And more pleasant. And feels more natural.

However if choosing to eat right and work out were only things I did in response to negative thoughts, those objectively healthy habits get left behind when I start seeking all things positive and pleasant.

It’s like a natural process for self preservation or some other psychological babble – I can only live a daily routine based on negative thoughts for so long before I’m unconsciously procrastinating activities based on those negative thoughts and favoring anything with positive associations.

So it’s Monday and I’m trying to change how I think about this beginning.

In the past I’ve thought about how I weigh too much – I need to eat less. I am too big – I need to work out. I can’t do things I want to – I need to eat less and work out.

Today I’m remembering that working out comes with an endorphin rush, the positive effects of which cascade through everything I do.  I’m thinking about how much I value taking time for myself and working on myself in a tangible, physical way. I’m thinking about what my stronger, fitter body will be able to do and not just how it will look.

I have a fitness instagram account and that’s where I’ve discovered a community that has shown me the love that fitness can come from and inspire. Feel free to follow for more routine updates there – @fitish.kitten

Comment with your thoughts  =)

Focusing on Fitness

The truth is most of the reasonably reputable fitness programs out there do work.

Whether it’s a 7-minute workout app, one of Anna Victoria’s programs (my personal faves), the programs of her competitors… or just a regular old treadmill and schedule… most programs do work. The missing ingredient isn’t what one program has and another doesn’t, it’s participation and follow-through.

I like things to happen instantly. I guess I am used to the instant satisfaction of social media and high-speed internet, instant downloads and such.  So I acknowledge that this is true about me: when I get a few weeks into a program and don’t see crazy results I start being curious about other programs and can be seduced by their promises.

It’s easy to forget that the before and after photos for ANY program’s advertisements are going to show people who have done the WHOLE program. Not just part of it. So why am I holding it against the program that I don’t see those results when I’m only part way through?

It’s not a super logical way to go about fitness. However, since I myself am susceptible to thinking that I should just move on I’m here to remind you the key is working hard. You can choose any framework and plan to give yourself structure and timelines but no plan works unless you do.

Here are my top 5 strategies for staying focused:

Don’t Negotiate

You know you want to get fit and healthy. And you know how. You have good food and a workout plan picked out… but this is about you.
You start thinking you’re so busy, or so tired, or not wearing the right clothes… you start to negotiate with yourself about how you didn’t snack so you don’t need to do the full workout or how you could just do two workouts tomorrow instead of one today and one tomorrow…

Stop.

When you start negotiating you start slipping. Don’t let yourself do that. Hold yourself to a high standard and remind yourself that if you compromise on your workout and meals, even just here and there, you’re compromising on the big goals that inspired you to start this plan.

Schedule or Create a Daily Deadline

Okay so, of course, it seems ideal to just schedule your workout and know that at this particular time you need to be getting sweaty. But if you find that nailing down a time doesn’t really promote the commitment you need then give yourself a daily deadline. For example, I know that I get my best results (I work hardest, and I make better decisions for the rest of my day) when I work out in the morning. Doesn’t really matter if it’s at 8:30am or 11:30am… as long as it is before noon. Noon is a mental divide for me. When I workout before then it sets my mood for the rest of the day and translates to better decisions food wise and continuing to move and be active.

But if I don’t work out before noon I tend to stay lazy. I snack passively and never really get moving or active.

So even though I don’t set a specific time to work out most days, I know my daily deadline is noon and I need to plan to workout before then.

Really, it comes down to having a plan, whatever is the most effective style or format for you.

Add a little Social Support (and a little Social Pressure)

I talked in my post How a Virtual Community is Fuelling Success in Real Life about starting my fitness-focused Instagram account, @fitish.kitten .  I had that account locked down as tight as I could – new followers had to send a request and be approved, and I used a quote instead of my face for a profile picture. If it came up in my friend’s social feeds as a recommended account it wouldn’t come up as me; my name and image were invisible unless you followed me and I did not allow most people I knew to follow me.

It was as though my desire to get fit was a secret.

My most recent progress photo (4 Weeks at the Beginning of BodyLove app)

 

I have photos of myself in typical stripped-down fitness wear for “before” photos and progress photos on this account. Originally the idea that people I knew, friends and family, would see these photos was horrifying to me. Like stop dead in my tracks and sweat a lot horrifying.

Recently I realized it shouldn’t be.  It’s no secret that I want to get fit. My body isn’t a secret, either. So I’ve got a little more curve than I want… it’s not a sin and it doesn’t need to be a secret.

There’s a lot of social support in posting online. There’s always positive role models and friends to remind you of your accomplishments and provide advice and encouragement through challenges.

Sometimes even more needed though is the social pressure. At this time I have 875 followers with @fitish.kitten. That blows my mind! I’m so honored that all those people wanted to see where I take my fitness journey… and sometimes, not wanting to let them down is the only reason I work out! (shhh!)

It’s like they say, pressure makes diamonds!

Focus on Feeling Better

It’s a body-positive world. For the most part, when you’re focused on a slimmer body and looking better you’ll find that these goals lose impact over time. One day I put on an outfit that doesn’t fit right and I hate the shape of my body so I get really motivated for working out and eating better.  But a few weeks later I buy a better-fitting outfit and I can move on.

I don’t need to lose weight to be loved. I don’t need to lose weight to be attractive. I don’t need to lose weight to be who I am and contribute to society.

So… why do I need to lose weight? Why do I need to take time out of my day to bond with the treadmill? And why do I need to put down the fries and make veggies my new BFF’s?

Because I can feel the difference. The moment I can go from my basement to the top floor of my house and not be awkwardly out of breath with a racing heart. The moment I can walk my hyperactive dog for an hour an a half without breaking a sweat. The moment I can say yes to trying new activities without doing the mental math on if I’m physically capable and how embarrassing failure might be.

These are the moments that keep me going and focused and motivated. The looks are a great benefit to having a healthy lifestyle but when changing my appearance was my only reason, I found better things to do with my time.

Pick Treats that add Value to your Lifestyle

I fully believe in cheating on your diet from time to time. I’ve come to feel there’s a difference though between just cheating because you miss junk food and cheating because it’s part of a larger lifestyle to enjoy a healthy indulgence now and then.

 

Remember that fitness can be fun, too!

For example, there’s a difference between me crushing a bag of chips alone while binging through the latest Netflix release simply because I deserve them as a treat and like snacking while I watch tv…. and me enjoying a super greasy burger while out with friends.

 

In one scenario the junk food has no purpose and adds nothing to my life. I would have watched the show anyway and I could have snacked on veggies or fruit with the same effect. However in the other scenario, the food wasn’t really the point – the social time with friends is. It’s nice to say yes to a cheat meal when doing so frees up the mental energy of eating healthy for you to give your friends your full attention while enjoying a night out.

Besides, for me personally, when I give myself a treat meal in isolation it’s almost like nobody saw it so it didn’t happen and I can just casually have another, and another until I’m binge eating whenever I’m alone. Which is every day given that I work from home and my partners have 9-5 jobs outside the home. It’s not healthy for me to develop habits like that so now I’m focusing on cheat meals that add value beyond just being a cheat meal for the sake of it.

 

What are the go-to ways you keep yourself on track?